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Guest midnight

It is with the saddest heart, I pass on the following:

Please join me in remembering a great icon.

The Pillsbury Dough Boy died yesterday from a yeast

infection and

complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was

71. Doughboy

was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of

celebrities turned

out to pay their respects including Mrs. Butterworth,

Hungry Jack, the

California Raisins, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain

Crunch.

The grave site was piled high with flours as long-time

friend Aunt

Jemima delivered the eulogy, describing Doughboy as a

man who never knew

how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show

business, but

his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not

considered a very

"smart" cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked

schemes.

Despite being a little flaky and referred to as a

crusty old man at

times, he was considered a roll model for millions.

Toward the end it

was thought he would rise again, but alas, he was no

tart. Doughboy is

survived by his wife Play Dough, two children John

Dough and Jane Dough,

plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by

his elderly

farther Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for

about twenty

minutes.

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