xward

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About xward

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  1. Humour

    As Sting said in his song "All this Time"
  2. aviators

    How the term "Aviators" came to be .... (The origination of the term "Aviator" has been guarded by a Secret Society that was formed about a thousand years ago. That modern "aviators" are strange is assumed, but why are they're so different goes back to how were they were initially created. This well guarded history is only now becoming known ... the fascinating history is below.) THE ORIGIN OF THE WORD "AVIATOR" In 1169, one of the least known, and certainly the most under-recognized military officer in history, was a General under the command of the infamous Genghis Khan, his name was Phu Khen (pronounced Foo Ken ). Most people have never heard of Phu Khen's contributions to our modern military and our existing tactics of warfare. The new mission of our Secret Society is to bring the recognition and honor that are due to the name of Phu Khen. A Khen was a subordinate to a Khan in the military structure of the Mongol hordes. Khan is Mongolian for leader. Most know of the great Genghis Khan, but little has been written of his chain of command. Khen is also of Mongolian origin, although there is not a word in English that adequately conveys the meaning. Roughly translated, it means "One who will do the impossible while appearing unprepared and complaining constantly". Phu Khen was one of ten Khens that headed the divisions, or groups of hordes as they were known, of the Mongol Army serving under Genghis Khan. Phu Khen's abilities came to light during the Mongol's raids on the Turkestan city of Bohicaroo. Bohicans were fierce warriors and the city was well fortified. The entire city was protected by huge walls and the hordes were at a standoff with the Bohicans. Bohicaroo was well stocked and it would have been difficult for the Mongols to wait them out. Genghis Khan was furious and assembled his ten Khens and ordered each of them to develop a plan for penetrating the defenses of Bohicaroo; his Generals were told that The Khan's new plan would be named Achieve Victory, and modern history records it simply as AV. All 10 Khens submitted their separate plans. After Genghis Khan reviewed plans AV1 through 7 and found them all to be unworkable or ridiculous, he was understandably upset. It was with much fear and perspiration that the eighth General, Phu Khen, submitted his ideas, AV8. Upon seeing Phu Khen's plan, Genghis Khan was convinced this was the perfect plan and gave immediate approval. The plan was beautifully simple. Phu Khen would arm his hordes to the teeth, load them into catapults and hurl them over the wall. The losses were expected to be high, but hordes are cheap. Those that survived the flight would engage the enemy in combat. Those that did not? Well, surely their flailing bodies would cause some damage. The plan worked and the Bohicans were defeated. Only one of the Bohicans was left standing. He would later become known as "The Last of The Bohicans." From that day on, whenever the Mongol Army encountered an insurmountable enemy, Genghis Khan would give the order "Send some of the Phu Khen AV8ers." Phu Khen's AV8ers were understandably an unruly mob and unlikely to be sociably acceptable. Many were heavy drinkers and insomniacs. However, when nothing else would do, you could always count on an AV8er. A Phu Khen AV8er. Denied (perhaps rightfully so) his place in history, Phu Khen has been, nonetheless, immortalized in prose. Even today you will frequently hear the mystical references, often in harsh tones, to "those Phu Khen AV8ers". As true today as it was a thousand years ago, AV8ers aren't bothered by these references. As with members of any other Secret Society we go largely misunderstood, prohibited (by our own apathy) from explaining ourselves. And so the mystery continues, as it has and as it will, why aren't we better understood? Why aren't we expected to continue the honorable and historic reputation of a Phu Khen AV8er, a reputation that has been carefully cultivated for centuries, undaunted by scorn and ridicule, unhindered by progress. This is believed (though not by anyone outside our secret society) to be the true origin of the word Aviator. When others are offended, you can revel in the knowledge that YOU are a PHU KHEN AVIATOR, so drink up, be crude, sleep late, pee under the fuselage, and then go get the job done.
  3. Take the chopper for a whopper?

    In the '70s in a military Twotter on search near Golden BC. Called the Air Radio station operator to order 6 Teen burgers from the local A & W to be sent by taxi to the airstrip for us. He pulled up while we were refuelling with sixteen hamburgers. The fueler and the air radio operator were thrilled with their free lunch.
  4. ZIP to fly overseas

    There has been a long standing rumour (from six months ago) that up to 6 of the 767-200's were to put into Tango to serve domestic routes in the summer and then Florida and the Carribean in the winter. Perhaps this is the culmination of that concept but using Zip instead.